Three Years Of Beaning!

So Cool Beans is reaching the ripe old age of 3 years this autumn, something that we are all genuinely surprised at and impressed with. It’s fair to say we’ve come a long way since our inaugural show at the Raynor Lounge back in October 2011, in which the highlight of that event was a Twister mat and blue monkey costume. A very long way indeed.

Cool Beans has become a festival touring, tour-booking, podcast-producing, video-making, bean-enchilada-baking, party-starting Sheffield-based institution. 2013 really has been special – the sounds of the Beans have been heard in places as far as the Scottish Highlands, the French Alps, Glastonbury Festival, the Edinburgh Fringe and more recently the naked-party island of Ibiza.

First and foremost – a huge THANK YOU to anyone who’s come to any of our shows, listened to any of our podcasts, booked any of our acts or simply complimented Ham Pocket on one of their lacklustre performances. It means a huge amount, your support is what keeps Cool Beans going and without you this whole operation would be one lonely man typing nonsense on the internet.

In celebrating 3 years of Cool Beans, we’ve made a new mix, a new podcast and are putting on a massive party!

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Now, earlier this year we put on the incredible King Porter Stomp at the Riverside. The mood and atmosphere in venue that night was frankly unbelievable, and we knew that we had to return at some point – what better occasion then than our 3rd birthday celebrations.

So without further ado, here’s what we have planned..

We are extremely proud to be bringing the mighty Hackney Colliery Band to Sheffield for the FIRST TIME EVER! You may have heard this 9-piece brass extravaganza on BBC 6Music with Craig Charles and Huey Morgan, you may have spotted them on stage as part of the Olympics Closing Ceremony last year, you may have caught them blowing the roof off a festival tent in a field somewhere or even caught a DJ spinning their phenomenal takes on Toto’s ‘Africa’ or Blackstreet’s ‘No Diggity’.

Wherever or whenever you’ve heard them the breadth of musical talent is clearly on display in their eclectic repertoire. Mining nuggets of funk, hip-hop and high-octane rock from the musical coalface and throwing in a few chunks of Balkan brass, ska and contemporary jazz for good measure, the Hackney Colliery Band’s setlist is as diverse as the London borough that gave them their name. Add the fact that the band stays true to its roots by bringing the tradition of mobile marching bands firmly into the 21st Century and you know that every gig’s sure to be unique.

Whether playing to a global audience of hundreds of millions or to a few hundred in a club, you can be certain of one thing: this is high-energy, good-time music that’ll make you want to move your feet.

Plainly and simply – this is the perfect headline act in rounding off 3 years of eclectic good times party music.

As main support we have enlisted the funky sounds of Dexter Dextrous & his band of merry men. They’ve been taking their energetic show all over the UK this year and their Cool Beans appearance in fact marks the first show of their Autumn Tour.

Their latest video “Devil Drives” is also a perfect, pre-Halloween warm up. Expect a raucous set of funk, swing, ska & soul!

Another Cool Beans debut, very happy to be welcoming the fresh, new, exciting delights of the Bone Lab. They claim to be the best Funk/Rap/Dance/Blues/Drone/Folk/RnB band in the world. Get down early and find out yourself!

Early evening entertainment courtesy of two of our favourite acoustic artists. The soulful, jazz-esque stylings of Jack Athey followed by the skill-full, finger-picking sounds of Andrew Duxfield. Absolutely delightful!

+ Poetry from Lonesome Dom
+ DJ sets from Thirsty Ear, Soulful Sally & us!

6PM – 1AM
£4 before 8PM – £6 afterwards
The Riverside, Mowbray Street

So there you go. It would be an honour and a pleasure if you would all join us for a massive evening of dancing, sweating and swancing (the ultimate combination of dancing and sweating).

No advance tickets for this one, show up early to guarantee entry. Last one with King Porter Stomp was a sellout!

Much love and thanks again for the good times,

Cool Beans. xx

Ham Pocket – The Final Farewell

Gather round children, let me tell you a tale. A tale of three men and their journey from rock bottom to an even rocker bottom. It’s the tale of the “band” they call Ham Pocket…

Ham Pocket formed in the winter of discontent and erratically exploded onto Sheffield’s live scene roughly 948 moons ago. Christopher Ham and Dominic Pocket performed a variety of tunes at the Green Room despite Dom’s crippling stage fright. Things were looking doubtful a few hours before the gig when Dom had downed 32 Stellas and chain smoked 3 packs of Lucky Strikes in an attempt to calm his nerves but he pulled it together in time. And the crowd were only mildly discomforted by his spontaneous vomiting throughout the set.

Their second outing saw them support Mr. B the Gentleman Rhymer and The Grand Old Lukes of Porkshire at the Harley. A landmark event for all involved, it was especially notable for being the moment Dom and Chris realised they had both been playing completely different notes for all their songs, resulting in an almost unlistenable performance. The Star newspaper gave them a thrashing the next day, the headline ran “Ham Pocket? More like Sham Bolic!”

In the summer of discontent they gained a member, Mr. Andy Enchilada, and with him they gained a whole heap of charm, style and panache. After being asked to headline the main stage at Tramlines (they refused – not enough cash) they embarked on their first UK tour, hitting such towns as Grimsby, Swaton and Shaftsbury Upon Haven. But the strain of being away from their families, friends and love ones grew too great, it eventually all blew up one night. A heated disagreement over a pack of Starburst lead Dom to throw an iron (and ironing board) at Chris’s face. They had lost track of what they set out to do in the first place; play great music and get loads of cash, booze, drugs and women. It was the end of Ham Pocket.

Post break up, Dom returned to his former job as a farm hand/wolf herder in Ashby De La Zouche, Andy had a relatively successful career as a welsh crooner (he got to number 6 in the Wales Charts with his deeply disturbing single “Mucky maid”) and Chris became involved into the vicious and illegal world of otter wresting. Ham Pocket were pretty much dead. Well that’s what everyone thought. After Dom had a near death experience with a particularly broody female wolf (a wolfette to be precise) they all realised life was too short to hold a grudge.

They embarked on their first comeback tour. They then quickly realised that they still hated each other and broke up again. They then missed the cash so they embarked on a second comeback tour, playing sold out shows in a variety of car trunks and a few local establishments such as the Harley, The Great Gatsby and Steve Hunt’s back garden. They also garnered some air time on Slovenia pirate radio (2 plays amounting to a PRS cheque of £0.0000000000000000001 – they split it three ways). It’s been no fun whatsoever but the journey finally ends for Ham Pocket: last orders for denim hot pants/acoustic comedy bronze/saucy folk bangers/altercations with El Krazy Kat (in fact, what’s all that about?)/the finest in bavarian and tropical fashion shall be this Friday the 14th June at the Fox & Duck as part of Broomhill Festival 2013.

Bidding farewell to a band that have been so overwhelmingly underwhelming is always tough, so they’ve enlisted the talents of better musicians in attempt to fill the place with punters…

Set times
07:30 – Ben Webster
08:00 – Sam Lee
08:30 – Kid Conventional
09:00 – Andrew Duxfield
09:30 – Sophia Pettit
10:00 – Pro-Verb
10:30 – 1/2 of the Grand Old Ukes of Yorkshire
11:00 – Ham Pocket
11:40 – 50 Sniffs

They’ll be the standard fine ales as well as some other drinks available, you can bring your own food as well. No dogs. Facebook event here.

After the frivolities, many shall be heading down to The Harley for a raucous after-party in which we can further the celebrations of Ham Pocket’s achievements (in which the tally stands at 1 and a half, the aforementioned slovenian pirate radio plays (the 1) and a guy called Paul once said they were good (the half) but he then went on to say he thought was commenting on Abba). DJs playing at this are Clipboard, Jimmy the Gent, Arnivore, Danny Mager and the Quality Controllers. Facebook event for the afterparty is here.

This is certainly the end of the Ham Pocket live experience, they may re-surface on the internet at some point, perhaps as guest vocals on a breakcore track or as extras in a slovenian pornography film, we just can’t say for sure yet.

Goodbye from HP. Much love.

Cool Beans Presents: King Porter Stomp

After our double headed beast of a bank holiday mad one at the Bowery/Leadmill last month, we are back with our second show of 2013 and it’s occurring at another venue with no prior beans history – The Riverside. Even though this party shack sits slightly out of the hustle bustle of the mean city streets, it’s recently become synonymous with incredible live music, delicious real ale and foot-stompingly good nights.

We for one, can not flipping wait.


Festival favourites and true party starters, King Porter Stomp blend ska, funk, afrobeat and hip hop to create a genuinely original, natural fusion of styles. The 8 dedicated members were called to Brighton from very different backgrounds and musical persuasions and first played together in Autumn 2006. Fast forward a few years, they’ve pulled on heart strings and won over the dancing feet of crowds across the UK and into Europe.

With big horns, heavy bass and delicately crafted and deeply conscious lyrics, King Porter Stomp have quickly established themselves as major players on the UK summer festival circuit. The high energy eight piece have already rocked stages at Glastonbury, The Big Chill, The Secret Garden Party, The Big Green Gathering, Eden Festival and Ireland’s Electric Picnic.

Energising, a blast! – THE INDEPENDENT ON SUNDAY
Ska, dub and hip hop treats – TIMEOUT MAGAZINE
Enjoyably raucous – EVENING STANDARD

We are ecstatic to be bringing the band to Sheffield for the very first time.


Explosive. Outspoken. Devilishly good-looking. Smiling Ivy perform an energetic fusion of ska, dub-reggae, punk and hip-hop. They effortlessly clash activism & hedonism on their records and offer fans an astute, socially-aware observation of the times all the while creating danceable, floor-filling music.

The Ivy retain enough power and aggression to be an active fixture in the UK’s rock scene but with reverberations of dub-reggae, funk, and hip-hop they also remain an illustrious figure in Yorkshire’s urban, rave and party scene.

You may have caught them showcasing their sounds at a multiple of summer festivals or performing alongside such acts as The Selecter, Dub Pistols, Zion Train, Frank Turner, The Correspondents and even Frankie Boyle. This gig is the only Sheffield date of their UK Spring Tour, which will see them play up and down the island in April/May.

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Sit back, relax and let acoustic these hip hop pioneers take you on a journey that will touch every sensory nerve in your body, apart from the disappointment nerve. Tom and James AKA Spit and Strings have been preaching their sounds for a few years now and with the recent addition of a full band their show has never been better. The band are however away for this show so the duo will be performing an intimate stripped down version of their current set. A rare treat.


A local legend ’round these parts, you may think you know Carl but well think again baby. And then think again after that. An integral piece of the Sheffield puzzle, when he’s not on fire Carl spends his time being the backbone in multiple acts and associations. For example – Peace in the Park, Jungle Lion, K.O.G & The Allstar Revolution, Banana Flavoured Dubcats, Jumping Wizard and loads more.


The Riverside are getting a special late license in from this one so we can continue the party long after King Porter Stomp have finished rocking it. Audible treats shall be provided by Arnivore, Crazyleaf, Lonesome Dom and Tony motherflipping Mulaga. Think reggae, balkan, electro-swing, ska, funk, hip hop, rave, coconut step and you’re only half way there.

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We’ll be taking some of the fun onto the delightful Riverside beer patio which overlooks the river. Acoustic acts, games and even the return of the gone-but-not-quite-forgotten Cool Beans enigma that is the Twister Mat shall all be making an appearance.


It’s also going to to be the last Cool Beans party before the summer frivolities kick in. This year we’re organising line ups for Tramlines, Peace in the Park and Broomhill Festival and DJing at about 15 other festivals all over the UK. This little shindig shall be the perfect send off!

Doors at 7PM / £3 before 8PM / £4 after 8PM
The Riverside, 1 Mowbray Street, Sheffield
Saturday the 27th April 2013

Facebook Event here. Get involved people!