Thank me later.

In this chaotic, mixed-up world we live in it can be easy to feel suffocated, to feel confused, to feel lost, to feel bummed-out. You need certain pick-me ups to make it bearable, revelations to facilitate your daily motivation.

Which is why I’ve taken it upon myself to get to the bottom to one of life’s most confusing matters.

The difference in calories between a two-fingered Kit Kat and a four-fingered Kit Kat.

Now I know this has been baffling the deepest of thinkers, worrying many of our top scientists and keeping the majority of the population awake at night. Exactly why does a two-fingered Kit Kat contain 107 calories, yet a four-fingered Kit Kat contains 233 calories? Why, oh why? WHY? Surely as the four-fingered Kit Kat is twice the chocolate bar the two-fingered Kit Kat is, it should have twice the calories? The four-fingered Kit Kat should contain 214 calories, not 233.

WHERE THE FUDGING HELL HAVE THESE EXTRA CALORIES COME FROM? WHERE MOTHER OF SCARY SPICE WHERE? FROM SPACE?! FROM MAGIC CALORIE LAND?!

If you think I’m just some kind of demented-sick-minded-freak-of-nature that just goes round making lies up about Kit Kats, go look for yourself:

http://www.kitkat.co.uk/content/kitkatcollection/TwoFinger

Mental isn’t it? Anyway, after months of research I have come to the conclusion that the additional calories come from the extra “stick”, or “glue” as I like to call it, needed to join two two-fingered Kit Kats together to make the four-fingered treat we all know and love.

Mystery solved. Now get back to work.

Comments

comments